During my recent sucky couple of days, which thankfully have passed, I took some time to reflect, as I like to do when the opportunity presents. After much contemplation, one thing I realised is just how grateful I am for every experience I have ever had, whether at the time I considered them to be “good” or “bad”. Yes all of them. I have had some pretty damn amazingly wonderful good experiences and some equally shitful distressing horrible ones. I feel incredibly blessed to have had all of them.
Why on earth would I be grateful for all of these, shouldn’t I just be happy to have had the good ones? I can’t say at the time that I was happy about the ones I considered to be in the negative category, but on reflection, with hindsight, things look a whole lot different.
You see the thing with all of our life experiences is that every single one of them makes us who we are, yes I know that sounds like a cliche and something that should be on a motivational meme, but it’s the truth. In order to know what we want, we sometimes have to bump up against what makes us uncomfortable and pushes us outside of our comfort zone into places we may not have been brave enough to tread. We need to experience both highs and lows in order to fully appreciate the highs, but also to know what we need to do in order to minimise the lows and have more of the highs.
Without having the experience of some of the things that felt less than wonderful (at the time) such as marriage, friendships, relationships, jobs, businesses, bullying, weight, physical and mental health issues, how would I possibly know what I know now? How would I have learnt how to create healthy boundaries for myself, how to prioritise self care, how to love again, have a happy marriage, supportive friends and work that I love? How would I have had the opportunity to “declutter” physical stuff, commitments and people that don’t add value to my life or bring me joy? Decluttering and simplifying has allowed me to bring in and attract everything I need and more, giving me a life of great abundance. Who would I be without my pain and suffering, the valuable lessons I’ve learnt on how to look after myself and how to prioritise what’s important in my life? I simply would not be the same person I am.
I was talking with my bestie yesterday and we were reflecting on how much my life has changed. During our chat I realised that if I was to think back to six months ago, a year ago, not to mention a few years, I just don’t feel like I’m the same person. I’m much wiser, I’ve grown in uncountable ways, I’m stronger and more resilient than I’ve ever been and can honestly say I’ve never been healthier or happier.
Would this growth have happened if I hadn’t have faced challenges? I doubt it, in fact I think I’d have to say it wouldn’t. Just like the giant redwood or sequoia trees that need fires in order to survive and grow, life gives us our own fires, in the form of trials and tribulations that often leave us reeling and full of despair and wondering how much more we can take. It takes time, but with the benefit of hindsight, there is a lesson in everything.
So I want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart, for all that has come my way.