Yes you read that title right.
Bloated in fact.
Not with food.
For my non Aussie friends this is one of our weird and wonderfully unique Australianisms. It’s slang for “couldn’t eat another bite” “couldn’t take any more food/drink”
It hit me yesterday. Hard. My brain hurts, and it’s like I can’t take another bite, not one little tiny little mouthful, or I might just explode.
I am an information junkie, read constantly, I’m a perpetual student and lifelong learner. For some reason, this week I reached my peak, then past my peak to my tipping point. I’m done. For now anyway.
This has only happened to me once before, about 4 years ago when I had a particularly stressful job I was trying to learn, manage and somehow sleep, and making a feeble attempt to look after myself at the same time. My health suffered as I wasn’t able to make good food choices, any good choices for that matter, and for the first time in my entire life I stopped reading at night. The words on the pages came out like ‘blablabla’ when I tried reading them. That period in time almost killed me and when I reflect back I feel so much gratitude for the experience as it pushed me to make the choices that led me to where I am today. I also feel a little reminder of the trauma at the same time, still fresh if I pick that scab off.
So, while I am often speaking of cutting back, simplifying, unsubscribing and deleting which I do regularly, I have found my information flow has stepped up a notch again.
I have literally more than a dozen browser windows open on all of my devices, so many saved Facebook links, and unread emails and I still want to read and read and learn and absorb and read some more. Everything fascinates me and I have such an unquenchable thirst for knowledge that I never want to stop.
How did this show up for me? What signs did I see? I first noticed it a few weeks back when I found I wasn’t able to read seemingly short blog posts, I got stuck in the really short attention span mode and if it was long I saved it, or if a video was more than 2 minutes I couldn’t commit. The past few days, I just feel like I am completely drowning in information. I’ve found myself signing up for the tantalising freebies that are offered as soon as something peaks my interest – result, my inbox went nuts again. My head aches, my eyes are dry and I just feel like enough is enough. I literally can’t take another byte.
What am I going to do about it? Last night I went through and deleted probably about 200 emails I hadn’t read, with reckless abandon because if they were still there after all this time, how important can they be? I am going to continue to unsubscribe as new mail comes. I will check through the saved links I have on Facebook and delete or read them all. I love that feature but it’s a bugger at the same time. I will go back to switching off at night, as I had enjoyed doing that and as a result I have been reading at least a book a week.
For the first time in many years, I am going to take a whole weekend off social media and the internet. From tomorrow evening through to Monday morning I will switch off. I will most write and read, but I won’t be looking, searching or asking Mr Google for the answer to any of life’s most important issues. Part of me doesn’t want to, as I run several businesses through social media, but for my brain and my health, it is necessary. I hope to start doing this more regularly. It’s really just a matter of reminding myself of the healthy boundaries I set for myself and encourage clients to put in place. I will then inform clients of my new opening hours and enjoy being free of the need to be present every weekend. I am going to go outside, breathe fresh air, touch the earth and soak up some sun. I will day dream, allow myself to be bored, colour in and make things.
It feels good even writing it here. I can feel my brain relaxing even as it considers the possibilities of a weekend spent in complete and total bliss as it releases what it no longer needs to know, refreshes and recharges itself in the midst of extreme self care.
How about you – have you had enough information, are you bloated and full too? If so, I invite you to join me for a digital detox this weekend.